Do you ever procrastinate eating ice cream, watching TV, playing video games, dancing, or doing anything that you love? On the other hand, do you ever procrastinate doing your taxes, doing your homework, working on a project for the job, washing the dishes, or cleaning your room?

So what is procrastinating? Avoiding what you don’t enjoy, or in other words, avoiding suffering. Of course, we’re going to avoid suffering, of course, we’re going to immediately go towards what we enjoy! You are not being an idiot for doing that. You are just being ALIVE!

When we try to apply the normal methods of how to stop procrastinating, they usually have to do with time management or trying harder or things like that, but we aren’t able to force ourselves to do it most of the time, simply because we’re not addressing the CORE reason why we’re avoiding it, and all the time-management tactics in the world won’t be enough if we’re avoiding suffering… so what CAN we do about it?

It depends on what specific suffering we have around the task, activity or issue.

Here are some major reasons why people procrastinate:

1. The task feels overwhelming – we have so much to do, we don’t know where to start. The way to get around that is by breaking down the big task into small little tasks. Focus on the first thing to do, rather than thinking of all the things you have to do and the way to really handle that is to not keep it in your head, but put it down on paper – write down all the things you have to do, as detailed as you can see them right now, and pick one to do immediately. Focus on the one first thing and start it NOW.
2. The previous time we did something, we didn’t enjoy it, we were unhappy while doing it, so now we’re avoiding it because we remember it as something “painful”. If the last time that you did your work, a specific task, a homework, it was unenjoyable, the reason why you avoid it is because you think the task or activity itself was unenjoyable, but please open yourself up to the idea that it really wasn’t. What MIGHT have happened was, you were unhappy while doing the task and then you thought the task made you unhappy. If you look with awareness and clarity, you will see that what made you unhappy was your own thought patterns in that present moment. In those moments that you were doing the task, you had some story in your head that was making you unhappy. The way to see that clearly is by recognizing that, most probably, in some moments, while doing the task, you were fully immersed in it and weren’t suffering at all, you just did what was in front of you to do… or by seeing how somebody else could be doing that task and they are not suffering!! So, in order to stop procrastinating doing an activity that you previously didn’t enjoy or that you were previously unhappy in, is to really identify what thoughts are making you suffer while doing that task and then recognize how they’re not true so that they stop impacting you.
   The most common thoughts that make you unhappy while doing a particular task, are linked to anxiety, so you might have a thought running in the background that it would be bad if you don’t get this done on time, or it would be bad if the boss didn’t like it, or it would be bad if it didn’t work out how you wanted it to – so it’s some variation of “it would be bad if… ” and when you tell that story in your head, it creates a sensation that you call anxiety and stress and then you think the stress is caused by the actual activity that you’re engaged in, but it’s not – the sensation is created by the story. The way to lose the anxiety is to discover you don’t know whether it would be bad for that “negative” outcome to occur. Can you think of any reasons why it might be good for you to not get that particular task done? Look carefully!! Think of reasons as to why the opposite could be true. When you recognize you don’t know whether it would be bad or good for the outcome you want to happen to happen, then you lose that story and you lose the anxiety that goes with it. Another “classic” is a thought that says: I’m not good enough. While doing a task, we often have these insecure thoughts of “I’m not going to be able to get this done, I’m not smart enough, I’m not quick enough”… so when those thoughts pop up in your head, ask yourself: do I know that to be absolutely true? Do I really know I won’t get it done? Do I know I’m not smart enough? Do I know I’m not capable of this, haven’t I done it before? Is it possible that I’m capable of it? And even if you’re not capable, if the answer is, indeed, “no, I really am not capable” – then you can work on how to make yourself capable. You can also, most importantly, most fundamentally, recognize that not being capable of one particular task doesn’t mean you are “less than” in any way.
3. Our mind tells us some story about how doing this particular thing will make us suffer and how it won’t feel good to do it. A thought pattern tells us something about the future which makes us think that we will suffer from doing the task. This is slightly different than what we spoke about before, so the most common thing perhaps in this category is the fear of failure. What happens is, if we think it would be better for us to achieve one outcome rather than another, then we will automatically be afraid of not achieving the best-case scenario, but even more than being afraid of that lesser outcome, we’re afraid about what it means about us! One of the ways that we tend to avoid that fear is by not giving our it our all – if I give a hundred percent effort towards one particular project and it doesn’t go well, it means I’m not good enough, but if I only give sixty percent effort towards it, then I have an excuse for why it failed. Recognize that the good outcome doesn’t mean you’re great and a bad outcome doesn’t mean you’re less than – this is how you become free to try your best you lose the need to procrastinate. Another perspective is, we often have this idea that “I am forced to do what I’m doing, so I have to do this, I have no choice”. This could happen with someone doing their homework, with someone in their job, etc. That mentality creates resentment towards the task, it’s forcing us to do something we don’t want to do and when we’re forced to do something we don’t want to do, we put it off, partially because we want to avoid things that we don’t enjoy. A way that this usually manifests is through telling ourselves the story of, “well, I may have to do it, but I can do it when I want, I don’t have to do it now!!” The way to get around this story in our head is to simply recognize we do have a choice – the choice is to do your work and get the boss to approve of you, or at least be okay with you, or don’t do the work and take the chance of being fired or talk to the boss and see if there’s something you can do about it or quit and do something else, as an example. When you recognize you are choosing to do or not do something, you stop blaming things on external reality forcing it on you. The empowerment here comes from seeing clearly: I am choosing to do this because I’ve evaluated the pros and cons and I’ve decided this choice is what’s best for me. Another reason why we avoid work is because we think “I’m not good enough to do it”, so we may have never done it before, or we may have done it before, but we still tell a story that, I’m just not going to be able to do it. In that situation, you can simply ask yourself the question: do I know that to be true? Is it possible that I will be able to do it? Have I done something similar before and been able to do it? Have I previously come to the conclusion that I won’t be able to do something and then when I tried, I actually was able to do it? And if you think you can do it, then you can ask yourself the question: do I know whether it’s better to fail or succeed in this? How do I know what’s best for my life? Do I know all the effects that could occur from this situation, from failing or succeeding? How do you know? The last thought that we’re going to talk about in this category of avoiding work because of what thoughts say, is the idea that if you do the work, you are missing out on something else, so you might think it’s a waste of time, it’s not fun. This is sometimes referred to as the fear of missing out. The whole premise of the fear of missing out and thinking we’d rather do something fun instead of that, is based on the idea that the best way to pursue happiness is through a series of experiences. Look at the reality of this situation though: if you’re waiting for fun moments like meeting someone, or while at work you’re waiting to for the night-time, or all week long you’re waiting for the weekend, or for six months you’re waiting for your next vacation… always waiting to be happy because you think happiness comes from accumulating fun moments, is that the way you want to live life? Is that a fulfilling way to live? A fun moment simply becomes a distraction from your constant stream of thoughts. When you’re engaged in any activity that has your complete attention, you’re at peace, you’re happy, you’re having fun – why? Because you’re not giving attention to all the thoughts in your head – when you are simply being present, it doesn’t matter what your job is, how much money you make, what your marital situation is, what you look like… when you’re distracted from your thoughts, whether you’re watching TV, playing sports, dancing, you’re fine! Distracting yourself from your thoughts to pursue happiness is an incredibly temporary solution. If you’re looking for happiness from distractions, you’re distracting yourself from thought for a moment, but all your thoughts WILL come right back. So, when you’re pursuing a fun moment instead of your work, what you’re saying is, this fun moment is the key to happiness.. but ask yourself: what do I want? Brief fun moments and deep suffering moments with a lot of lack and waiting and struggling in between, or do I want to live a life of fulfilment, to enjoy everything that I do, to always feel complete and whole? The way to be at peace is to discover how to be happy in any situation, not to constantly try to change everything and everyone to make those match your idea of perfect, that never works, because no matter how perfect everything is, you still have the same thoughts…
4. We have some suffering now that could be completely unrelated to the task and so we want to avoid that suffering and we immediately go into distractions like TV, internet, relationships, and things along those lines. In order to stop doing this, you have to understand why you’re doing it and there’s really a simple answer and that is, our mind goes to what makes us happy. When you watch that cat video on Facebook, when you read an interesting article, when you look at photos, when you eat, you have a little bit of pleasure, a little high, and so what happens is that creates a memory of pleasure and then, in this moment, in any moment that you feel a sense of lack, you immediately look to escape that feeling of lack by going to the easiest source of pleasure, something that takes your attention away from how you feel and away from the thoughts you have in this moment. The way to avoid doing that, is not to force yourself to stop – “I need to stop doing that” doesn’t work. If you’re not addressing the reason why you’re going to something, no amount of discipline is going to stop you from going there, so the way to free yourself from this constant urge to escape how you feel and go to distractions is to look at how you feel in the moment that you’re pulled to go to a distraction. If right now I’m trying to do my work and I feel like going to have ice cream, think about: what am I trying to escape now? You will, most surely, find some story going on that’s making you unhappy – it may be some thought about how you’re not good enough, how your life isn’t good enough, it could be anything but you need to look for yourself to see what thoughts you are trying to avoid, because that’s what distractions are doing: avoiding thoughts, distracting you from thoughts. The way to stop having the pull to go to distractions is to stop suffering, to stop being at the mercy of these thoughts in your head… and the way to stop being at the mercy of the thoughts in your head is to look at them!! We never spend time with our thoughts, we always need to be distracted, in every single moment! Do you EVER spend time by yourself, with no distractions? If you can’t be with your own thoughts, of course you’re going to try to escape them, in every moment. If you’re not at peace, you’re going to procrastinate because you’re going to associate your task with suffering and you’re gonna try to avoid your suffering by going to things that make you happy, so if you want to stop procrastinating, what you really want is to get to feel peace and happiness and the way to get that is to be willing to look at what thoughts you’re telling yourself over and over again and then look at whether they’re true or not.
5. The task just isn’t the right fit for us – maybe you really love interacting with people and you’re in a job where you’re in programming data all day, so that’s not the ideal fit for you, you don’t feel motivated, enthusiastic, pulled to go do it… in that case, you could recognize that and then try to pursue a different job, pursue a different way to spend your time, but here’s the most important thing to understand about that: if some task is not the right fit for you, you won’t actively avoid it, it doesn’t make you suffer, it’s neutral. If you’re trying to avoid something, it’s because it’s not neutral, it’s because you believe it’s making you suffer. If something is not the right fit for you, it can’t make you suffer – the only thing that can make you suffer is the thoughts in your head, that’s it!

Does this make sense?